First Impressions
They say that you should never judge a book by its cover, and, especially regarding people, it’s true. In this case, the “cover” is not necessarily meaning the appearance, but the first impression of another person. Like the cover of a book, first impressions are not always as appealing as what is really there. It’s not until after you start “reading”, or get to know someone, when you really find out that what you see is not always what you get. There are several factors that can affect the first impression that one receives from another. Differing personality, situations and presentation of a person, make first impressions often the worst means of judging people.
A person’s personality has a big effect on the first impression that they emit. Everybody is different, but when it comes down to it, first impressions are really based off of whether you’re shy or not. I met my best friend after moving during my junior year, at my new high school. Before I knew her, she never said a word to me or anyone else in the classes that we shared together. I received the impression that she was kind of odd, but then realized that I was the same way. I didn‘t talk to many people either because of my personality. I knew that I was a shy person and that after I get to know someone, I put down my front and show my true colors. I thought that maybe she would be same way. After starting to talk to her a little more each day, our friendship grew and I learned that she wasn’t odd at all, but just like me- an outgoing person hidden by their shyness. Some people, like me and my friend, are shy and put up a reserved and quiet front when facing new people. Based on my first impression of my friend, I thought something that was far from the truth. One who has a shy personality might in reality be outgoing, but uncomfortable showing it at first, making the first impression of that person a mistaken one.
Your first impression of someone is not suitable because you do not know of the situation they may be in. When seeing or meeting someone new, you have no idea the kind of day, difficulties or kind of disappointments that person may be experiencing. They may have had a rough morning, may have recently lost someone, or could be somewhere new and yet still have to deal with the routines and stresses of going through out their day. All of these situations can create a barrier between themselves and others, and setting off a good impression is probably not at the top of their list of important things to do. On my first day of college, I walked hurriedly to my first class, even though I had plenty time to get there. When I walked into my first class, the only thing on my mind was to find a seat right away, no matter if it was by another person or not. When the time came to eat lunch, I sat by myself and ate it quickly so I could proceed to my next class. I was a nervous wreck because I was somewhere new. I was so worried about being late for a class, finding a seat and just doing things right, that I didn’t have time to try to leave any good first impressions on any of my peers. It wasn’t even on my mind to do so. My peers received the impression that I was a nervous and not sociable person, when really I was acting the way I was because of the situation that I was in.
The way someone presents themselves doesn’t always suit their personality and show who they are. Unfortunately one’s presentation is the first thing that others see, and the first thing that people are judged on. Some people look and dress a certain way either because they want to, or because they have to, based on their financial situation or to fulfill some type of status. My older sister works at a print shop, where she gets many different customers looking to get printing done. One frequent customer in particular is a member of the Devil's Disciples motorcycle gang. I happened to be helping at the shop when he stopped in one day. When I first saw him, my first instinct was to back into a corner. He was a big guy, had tattoos, and was wearing a lot of leather. After he chatted with us for a little bit, I calmed down. He was just a regular guy and I felt silly for thinking I was in danger. His appearance didn’t match his personality at all. He was nice enough to invite us to a barbeque he was having, and when my sister’s birthday came around, he sent her a basket of lotions. I received the wrong first impression from him because of the way he dressed and presented himself.
There are many factors that lead to someone’s first impression of another. Someone’s personality, current situation, or the way they happen to present themselves all influence the way someone thinks about a another when seeing or meeting them for the first time. Since what they think is based off of these judgments, their first impression is usually wrong. If all friendships were based upon first impressions, there would be a lot less of them in the world. First impressions are often