My Darling, Wonderful Patcharee,
Forgive me for not writing yesterday; I spent most of the day vomiting and feeling sorry for myself.
I know that you love and miss me but we have to accept that the dream of being together has been taken away so while we can cherish beautiful memories we must both accept that I am dying and we must adjust our dream.
It is very important to me that nobody should take care of me when I am ill. When I cannot care for myself I will ask God to let me die quickly. So, let me tell you what I hope to do before I die and what you can do if you want me to die happy.
You will remember that my Mexican Partners went out of business when I was in Thailand and almost made my business bankrupt. On the days when I am not in too much pain, I am still trying to recover some of the lost money because IF it is possible (I cannot promise) I wish to contribute to the costs of you doing your master’s degree. If I am able to do that it will make me happy BUT I will be even more happy if you promise me that you will look to the future and be prepared to share it with someone who is there to love and care for you forever.
Please do this for both of us. Please do it so that I do not have to spend my last days or hours worrying that my Patcharee is living in the past.
I ask this because I love you.