Views of child:
Views of Saw Saw Moo, BID child
He stated that he likes his school and he also has many friends and he used to play marbles with them after school time. He mentioned that he finished pau.1 at Thai school while he went to stay at Bong Ti with the grandparents. He attended pau.2 but he did not finish it because he came back to the camp with the grandparents. He said that he liked studying there as well.
When asked, he said that his father’s name is Po Klot and his mother already died a long time ago. He said that he has been always staying with his grandparents and his father is staying with his current family at their house which is not very close to his house. When asked, he said that he visited his father’s house sometimes to see a movie there because he has no movie player at his house. He mentioned that he did not meet his father when he went to his house because his father went out to work and only his aunt (step-mother) was at home and looking after her children. He said that he also likes to play at the stream nearby their house and he sometimes eats at their house too. He however stated that his grandmother cooked better meal than his aunt. He said that he went to sleep with the father once because his father asked him but he never went to sleep there again because he did not like it. He does not also have close relationship with his half-siblings. When asked, he said that his aunt never invited him to stay with them but she used to wash his cloths once when he was at her house after he played in the stream. When asked again, he said that he remembered his father hugged and kissed him only one time but his grandmother did it all the time.
He stated that he will not stay behind with the father and he will not also miss him when he is resettled. He also does not want to wait the father to be resettled together with him and he just wants to go for resettlement ahead with grandparents and he would study English there. He said that at home, if he needed anything, he just approached his grandmother. His uncle Kye Kye is not staying with them anymore because he went to work outside in Thailand.
He mentioned that he never wanted to stay away from the grandparents and he would always follow them. When he went out together with the grandparents in Bong Ti for a year, he was happy staying with them and he did not even miss his father. He said that he is firmed that he would not stay either with his father or aunt and he would only go with the grandmother because he would not be able to stay without the grandmother and he loves her most in his life. He used to help his grandmother with fetching water at home and also massage the grandfather since he is not very well.
He mentioned that he knew his aunt Lay Ley and he would let his aunt take care of him if one of his grandparents got sick. His aunt also said that she is willing for him to come to her and told him that she would be very happy to see him. His aunt called and talked to him once a month and he loves her as well. When asked, he said that comparing to the father, he would love more of the aunt because she sent him pocket money but his father never gave him pocket money. He said that they are going to stay at the same house with the aunt.
Views of Family and close relationships:
Views of Kee Thu, the section leader
He said that the grandparents want to be resettled together with the child and he is sure that the child also does not want to leave the sides of the grandparents since they are very much attached to each other. He stated that the child is full time staying with the grandparents since birth and he just visited the father’s house sometimes. He opined that the child has less attachment to the father because he never stayed with him and the father also went out to work most of the time. He also does not think the father would be able to take care of the child both in physically and emotionally as the grandparents although he would love his child. He also does not think the step mother would be able to take care of the child well if he had to stay with them because she has her own two children to look after and she does not seem to have attachment with the child as well. He also said that since the child only grew up under the close attention of the grandparents after the death of the mother, if he was left with the father when the grandparents are resettled, the father might not be able to give full attention as the grandparents. The grandparents sent the child off to school every day and they are very detailed in caring the child. At the moment, the father went out to work every day and his wife stays home and taking care of her two children. He therefore said that the grandparents are so far the best caregiver to the child and the child should remain with them for the better development of the child. The section leader also shared that the father also mentioned that he would let the child to be resettled with the grandparents.
Views of Saw K’ Pay and Paw Da, the maternal grandparents/caregiver
The grandfather mentioned that he is now suffering the sickness (pile) and he is not able to sit because it would make him hurt. Therefore, last year in 2014, they went to Bong Ti to get the traditional medical treatment for a year and the child also went with them because he did not want to stay behind without them. The child therefore studied one year at Thai school and he passed pau-1 (grade-1) at Bong Ti and they came back when he started to attend pau-2. The grandfather said that he was getting better but he was not completely cured. The grandfather mentioned that they tried to convince the child to stay with the father as previous panel recommendation but the child just went to eat at the father’s house and came back. The grandparents mentioned that the father is not able to provide attention to the child since he is mostly working outside and the child was always staying with them since birth. At the moment, the father went to work outside every day since 4 to 5 months ago. They said that they would not feel secured for the child if he was left with the father and the aunt also cannot take care of him because she has her own children to care for. They worried that she might ignore the child if he is not listening to her so that the child might be left alone by himself for some reasons. They said that the child went to sleep with the father one time when the father invited him but he never went to sleep there again. The child also has no attachment with the paternal relatives (as mentioned in previous report).
The grandmother mentioned that they are going to join their daughter called Lay Ley in USA and will stay at her house. They also have regular contact with her and she told them that the child should include with them for resettlement; worrying the father and step mother might not be able to take care of the child if he was left with them. The grandmother also said that she is able to take care of the child without any problem at the resettlement country. They mentioned that her son Kye Kye has already got married and staying outside and he was not interested to be resettled. They are not also willing to wait for the family of the father since they mentioned that they have to plan to resettle. They said that they do not want to delay their resettlement decision because they want the child to get a better future at the resettlement country as soon as possible.
The grandmother also said that previously when they were counseled to leave the child with the father and she agreed to leave the child with the father after she was counseled many times but she actually was not able to stay away from the child and the child also never left her side. She asked to consider the fact that they alone raised the child since he was born.
Views of K’Let, a neighbor
She mentioned that the child was raised by the grandparents since the death of the mother and he is only attached to them. The father never supported or raised the child during all those times. At the moment, the child just visited the house of the father when he wanted to ask for pocket money or to eat there. He called the grandparents ‘mother’ and ‘father’ and they love each other very much. She opined that if the child was left behind to be with the father, he might get emotional trauma because she did not see the father really took care of the child and she did not also see the father tried enough to get the child to be with him. Therefore, since the child never stayed away from the grandparents, it is not a good idea to separate the child from them and the child’s emotional status needs to be considered. The maternal aunt (step-mother) now has her own children to take care of and she does not think she will be able to give attention to the child as well. She opined that the child should be included in the grandparents’ resettlement plan. She worries that if the child was left behind, he might not listen to the father and he would go and do his heart desires without any proper guidance which will be negatively impact his future.
Views of Paw Meh, the stepmother/maternal aunt
She mentioned that the child did not have intention to come and stay with them and he just came to eat and went back to the grandparents. The child came to sleep with them once but he never spent the night with them again. The child told that he would not stay with the father and he would only go with the grandparents. When asked, she mentioned that she would have to take responsibility if she was asked because she used to say she would take care of him before. She also mentioned that the child has no choice that he has to come and stay with them if he was left behind. However, he would feel very sad and he might feel that he was forced to stay with the father. She also mentioned that the father is working outside every day and therefore, she would be the only one to take care of the chi