If your eye doctor had a luxurious beard
Would you prefer his direct ophthalmoscopy
To other intrusions that you’ve always feared
For example: procto-sigmoidoscopy?
For the latter, it’s hard on the elbows and knees,
And you lean to direct ophthalmoscopy
For you’re losing your normal sang froid by
degrees
Vis-a`-vis that procto-sigmoidoscopy
You cling to your dignity, but there is no way—
Undraped, in that awkward position
And your fondest wish is that, some day, in some
way
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All rights reserved. doi:10.1016/j.survophthal.2005.02.001
You can do the same to your physician
But—
As your ophthalmologist searches for retinal flaws
His huge beard is a big problem, which is