I would say to love is definitely the choice. It is your decision to love, but the decision of others to reciprocate that.
In the eyes of the Roman stoic philosopher, Epicletus, one of three things that do not depend on our efforts is honor or love. We cannot determine if someone loves us, even if it is something we want or aim for, because no matter what, other people have the control of interpreting who you are and generating an opinion of you.
Instead, what we can control is ourselves and the choices we make. Our decision to love is one that requires a lot of emotion and genuine care, and we can only hope to be loved back.
Epicletus believed we cannot live concerning ourselves with consequence and results. What should be our focus, however, is simply the decisions we make. Worrying of the results makes us live in the future, and not fully engage in the now.
Therefore, giving love, loving others, matters much more and should be our focus, rather than doing all we can to be loved.