Visiting on Special Family Occasions:
For the first three days after a child is born, until after the lama has performed a purification puja, the mother receives no visitors apart from close family members.
Always ask if it’s convenient before visiting a mother with a new baby.
A present of eggs, rice or maize would be given in a village and perhaps baby clothes or diapers in a town.
A small amount of money is also given to the new baby for good luck.
When a death occurs in the family of a friend or colleague, it is polite to visit the family taking a white scarf, an uneven sum of money in an envelope and some food e.g. biscuits for the deceased. Ask when would be a suitable time for your visit. It is much appreciated if you also take a bottle of whiskey for the bereaved. You will be expected to sit quietly for a short time with the family and drink tea.
Dining/Eating Etiquette:
When eating in a group, on all occasions, wait for everyone to be served before starting to eat, even in restaurants.
When invited as a guest, the host will politely ask to you to start eating once everyone is served.
You may notice some members of the family or the host himself will serve himself only after the guests have started their meal. This is in keeping with the Bhutanese custom of serving the guests first.
When you invite a Bhutanese for a meal, make sure you request the guest to start the meal. You yourself should start only after they have started eating
Greetings and Farewells:
Shaking hands is not a Bhutanese tradition but it is becoming quite common, especially in the towns.
A formal greeting is to bow with hands open and outstretched and the palms up.
When wishing to be polite or to indicate interest, the Bhutanese add “la” to the end of sentences during a conversation. Often they add “la” even when speaking in English.
When a senior person enters a room, everyone is expected to stand until the person sits down. When it is time to leave, everyone waits until the guest of honor stands, indicating that he or she is about to go.
Forms of Address:
Titles are extremely important. All persons of rank should be addressed by the appropriate title followed by their full name.
Male member of Royal Family = Dasho
Female member of Royal Family = Ashi
Minister = Lyonpo
High officials = Dasho
Directors = Dasho
Teachers = Lopen
Monk = Gelong or Lopen
A man is addressed as ‘Aap’ and a boy as ‘Busu’; a woman is addressed as ‘Aum’ and a girl as ‘Bum’
Personal Space:
The Bhutanese have a different approach to personal space and personal property than do westerners.
When it comes to personal property the Bhutanese often have a “what’s yours is mine” attitude, primarily based on the fact that, as Buddhists, they have little regard or interest in personal property, as it is of a fleeting nature and relatively unimportant in the grand scheme of human existence.
If you are courteous and respectful of religious beliefs, you are unlikely to cause offence. Using the word la at the end of a sentence in either Dzonkha or English is a sign of respect.
You should also follow normal Asian standards of courtesy and behavior in Bhutan. These include respect for monarchy, modest dress, and no public displays of affection.
Use the right hand, or better yet, both hands to give or receive an object.
Don’t use your fingers to point, especially at deities or religious objects; use an open hand with the palm up.
When waving someone towards you, keep your palm pointed down.
Never touch the crown of the head, for example a young child’s; this is considered a special part of the body.
Most lakes are the abode of gods or spirits. Don’t swim, wash clothes or throw stones into them.
As in all Asian countries, you should never point your feet at someone. If you are sitting on the floor, cross your legs or kneel so that your feet are pointed behind you. If you happen to sleep in a room where there is an altar or statue, ensure that your feet do not point toward it.
The Asian concept of keeping face also applies in Bhutan. Try to suggest instead of insist. Asian people dislike saying ‘no.’ If you make a suggestion to visit a certain landmark or order a particular dish and are met with an obviously lame excuse, this means that it is probably impossible.
Photography:
A camera is still a curiosity in most of Bhutan, particularity in remote villages, and your camera may draw a curious crowd.
Photography is not allowed inside any temples; don’t embarrass yourself by asking.
If you are attending a festival, do not let your picture taking interfere with the dancers or block the view of the spectators.
Most people like having their picture taken, but out of respect, ask first. People love to be shown the photo on the screen
Dress:
Asian standards of modesty apply.
Both men and women should avoid wearing revealing clothing, including short shorts, halter neck tops, and tank tops. Nudity is completely unacceptable.
Bhutanese are flattered if foreigners wear traditional dress, and are more than happy to help you buy, and put on, a gho or kira, which is not an easy process
Phew! Now you can see just how important etiquette is in Bhutan – keep these handy hints in mind when visiting!
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