Everyone was safe.
The captain slowly fell back into his chair, suddenly very aware of the uncomfortable silence that had fallen over the bridge. His crew was staring at him with various looks of confusion and worry.
The bright light that filled the room cast his handsome face into dark shadows. Jim’s normally shining blue eyes were ringed with dark circles, and he did not hold himself as straight and tall as before. There was no doubt that this was not the same man who had ignored the prime directive just to save his friend.
It was no secret that the Khan incident had shaken the captain. Everyone in Starfleet knew how much Jim had sacrificed to keep the Enterprise in the air. He was a hero back on earth, but he didn’t feel like a hero. His mentor was dead as were about half of his crew just because he had wanted to get even. No one said it, but he knew that their blood was just as much on his hands as it was Khan’s and the Admiral’s.
It was a dark bit of irony that the one who had cost him so much was the only reason that their savior was alive. Khan’s blood coursed through his veins, mixing with his. It was like he had been contaminated, he was unclean…tainted.
But are you really James? Maybe you are simply…better…smarter. You are a survivor; you saved all of these people from terrible deaths and-