1. Don’t get too excited about your next thought.
People can tell when you aren’t truly listening because you just can’t wait to spit your next thought out. Before they’ve finished, you’re already eager to tell them about an amazing experience you had. Make it a point to listen before you speak. If your story’s really interesting, it will still be interesting in five minutes.
2. Ask good questions that show you’re engaged.
One of the best ways to show engagement is by expressing a natural curiosity for what the other person is telling you. Make it a point to ask at least one question before moving on to the next topic. Gathering details makes it more likely that you’ll be able to establish a connection with the other person or find a way you can lend a hand.
3. Do your homework without being creepy.
There’s a thin line between properly preparing yourself for a conversation and being creepy. Before you have a planned conversation, take a look at the person’s LinkedIn or Twitter account to get an idea of his tone, interests, etc. You’re always at an advantage when you know more about a person. It will be easier to relate to him — and you might avoid an awkward conversation or two.
4. Try to genuinely relate.
Some of the most important conversations we have are with those people who have “fan clubs” trying to form relationships with them. They can spot a fake bonding opportunity from a mile away. Don’t force the conversation. Try to hit on something the other person is passionate about that you’re also interested in. That way, the rapport is genuine and the person is more open to talking in-depth about the subject.
5. Don’t waste people’s time.