I read the paper and realised that in Europe au pair is supposed to be a special guest in a family, and the visa will be given when applier has shown special interest to the destination country and it's culture, language and people before application is sent. To cover her expences in a family, au pair is allowed to do some light house work and babysitting, like 6 hours a day for example. Otherwise it is considered as working and that is different kind of visa, probably even harder to get. So all the things mentioned in application or in the embassy, sounded to them that this is a job, not a visit as au pair. I still have to read some more, to find out what possobilities we have because we would not want to give up yet. So we get back to this soon!
Terveisin
Ville