You raised my son hope of being with you high and you let him down the same way.... Above all, you lied to me because you told me that you don't have enough to go there and get James or to send to his teacher to get James sent to you and I asked you to tell me what you can afford to send to his teacher but you came up with another story that you can only cook for James but can not spend your money for him... You should have just tell me you don't trust me and James and you don't even want to go there and pick him instead of deceiving us.... I think you are suffering from lack of self-trust which can be the precursor of distrusting others. In an increasingly complex world, our ability to judge real or not real, scam or opportunity, credible or not credible, trust or no trust, is a twenty-first century necessity. And it begins with self-trust. Do you trust you?
Can you trust your motives, intentions, impulses, and judgment? Do you lie to yourself? Do you break promises you make to yourself? Can you count on you to deliver what you say you will? Are you in an authentic relationship with yourself? Do you trust your own judgment and the risks you take when giving trust?
We expect people who are like us (e.g. gender, race, hair color, etc.) to be like us. So, if you break your word, you think that others will, too. If you over-promise and under-deliver, that’s what you’ll expect from others. But if you’re trustworthy, you tend to assume others are, too.
Yet, while we may see each other as alike, we’re very different. That’s why building trusting relationships requires self-trust.
Self-trust involves trusting your own intentions, motives and integrity. Self-trust includes reliance on self and confidence in self-actions. But it goes deeper. Self-trust is “the ability to trust oneself to trust wisely and authentically,” Self-trust is grounded in self-awareness, well-intentioned and consistent behavior, and commitments honored and fulfilled. You’re unlikely to be viewed by others as trustworthy, if you don’t view yourself that way. And you’re unlikely to view yourself that way, if you’re not that way.
Self-trust is a skill that fuels accountability. Self-trust grows when there is alignment between what you say and what you do, often referred to as behavioral integrity. Behavioral integrity is how you demonstrate your trustworthiness to yourself and to others. How’s yours? No alignment – no credibility. No credibility – no self-trust. No self-trust – no accountability. Self-trust is the basic tenet of accountability. When we hold ourselves accountable for our actions, decisions, choices, words, and behaviors we build self-trust. Building self-trust requires a mirror. It means there’s an self-initiated, account-giving relationship between who you say you are and who you are.
Self-trust is core to the most important relationship – the one with self. A practice of authentic self-trust offers a way to explore your possibilities, gifts, and passions. Self-trust grows the inner path. It aids the discovery of your life’s potential. “Trust creates the flow and gentles the mind-body-spirit. When I trust myself I am able to enter fully into the process of discovering and creating who I am. When I trust my own inner process I am able to become what I am meant to become.
I am grateful to be able to say “yes, I trust myself”. It took a long time but with pride I know it’s true.
Human life is built on trust. Whether it is the relationship between man and woman, friends or relatives or thy neighbors, he who trusts others lives a peaceful life because, if you do not place trust on others, your life will be in trouble. Basically, you should trust your own self and it takes years to build up a trust but just one second to destroy it. Trusting a person and then becoming suspicious of it, is like throwing stones while staying in glass house.
Trust is like a kind of mirror and once you feel a scar in it, it will never be the same again. So, trust is essential in any kind of friendship or relationship. Distrust is like a drop of ink in a blotting paper. The majority of white color will not be visible; only the drop of ink will be visible. So, think not twice, but many times before you sow the seed of distrust. A well trusted person is worth thousand friends.
You made me regret ever coming across someone like you on the internet...