Describe a typical weekend in your home. Before Michael, we watched a lot of movies and went out to dinner a lot. Now we go out to dinner maybe once a week with Michael. But on the weekends, we like to take Michael to the park, zoo, and to visit friends. Now that he is a bit older, I would like to take him on more weekend trips to visit other parts of the country and world.
Describe the frequency and duration of business travel. I don't travel often for work. Sometimes I go to Washington DC for a day or two, and Mike will travel for work once or twice a month. Some months he travels more than others, but it's generally shorter trips (like a night or two).
Describe the frequency and duration of evening activities that take you outside the home. On weekdays, we don't do much. I come home from work a little before 6pm, and Mike comes home from work a little after that. We catch up with Natty, our au pair, to find out what Michael ate and did for the day. Then we make dinner and eat as a family. We let Michael play for a bit, change him into his pajamas, and give him his bottle. We get him ready for bed by doing our night time routine, which is to read books in his room and to say good night to various things and books in his room. He sleeps from 8:30 pm to 7am usually.
Describe the relationship you would like to develop with your au pair as host parents. We want our AP to be happy and comfortable living with us. We want the AP to feel like she's part of the family, and not an employee or visitor. We also know she's here to learn and experience new things, and will go out of our way to expose her to new experiences, places, and people. Also, we'll help her learn English. Our current au pair has a lot of friends, and goes out with them often after work and on weekends. We like that, and encourage it, because it means she is comfortable living in the US, and has made a life for herself here. She eats with us occasionally when she does not have plans, and we welcome her to eat with us anytime she wants, but there is no pressure or obligations if she would rather hang out with her friends or by herself. We give her a lot of personal freedom to live her own life. We could continue to do the same for our new au pair. So for example, if the AP is comfortable cooking and eating with us, she is more than welcome to do so, but at the same time, we are respectful of boundaries and the AP's personal time and space. We will not encroach, and expect the AP to respect our personal time and space.
How would you like your au pair to integrate with your family outside of work hours? Consider which activities you would like to share versus times when you would provide your au pair with independent time. As mentioned above, although we want her to take her job seriously and make taking care of our baby her first priority, we want her to feel like she is not a stranger or just an employee. If we go on vacation or day trips, we will ask if the AP will want to join us outside of work hours. She's also welcome to join us for meals as well, but is not obligated at all. We often have family members, like Mike's parents, my mom, and my sister and brother in law here. So we have larger family meals, which Natty sometimes joins.
What is your communication style as a family? How do you like to resolve challenges and miscommunication? We are assertive, and hope to always clearly communicate with our AP. We want our AP to do the same, and tell us immediately if there are any issues or problems, instead of letting things build and fester. We want to resolve any conflicts and if we are able to talk to each other honestly and openly, we will avoid miscommunication and any other problems that may arise from any miscommunication.