How would you like your au pair to integrate with your family outside of work hours? Consider which activities you would like to share versus times when you would provide your au pair with independent time. We would like our au pair to integrate well enough with us that she can share some meals and activities with us, but we want her independent enough that she has friends and activities that she is involved with too. We would likenher to feel comfortable enough with us that she can come with us on vacation to the beach or the mountains. We also would like to know what she is involved in to make sure she is safe.