This was the originally submitted version of this paper. The published version is also available on SSRN. Abstract: "Virtual property" is a solution looking for a problem. Arguments justifying “virtual property” lie among three common themes - Lockean labor theory, theft protection and deterrence, and market efficiency. This Article goes beyond those who advocate for or against the creation of "virtual property" by first dismissing Locke’s labor theory as a justification. Then, this Article explores two models of what property rights may look like when applied to virtual resources. These models are then applied to six different virtual world scenarios in order to see the effects of "virtual property." Finally, this Article explains the failure of property rights to benefit the users, developers, and virtual resources of virtual worlds.