And that wasn’t the only part of his character she grasped.
That night when the curse from the Mazoku activated, he gently embraced Lefille despite her shameful actions.
That’s right. Back then I was—
— Yes, she was fearful back then.
She felt the young man who noticed something was wrong and came to her was scary.
No matter how kind and gentle he was, he was still a man. If he saw how she was and that she was doing something shameful, there was no telling what he would do to her.
The instant his arms embraced her, her heart was filled with fear towards the young boy who was worried about her and wanted to help.
In the end, Lefille saw the emotions in his eyes were opposite of the fear she felt, and didn’t have a shred of violence.
In his eyes were the light of sympathy and empathy. Normally, he should feel that her shameful appearance was disgusting. But despite that, his hands that touched her back then were so gentle. He didn’t lose his head to his base desires that would stem naturally. The hands touching her skin were trembling silently because of his anger towards the curse.
She groaned to his touch, and when she realized it, she heard his apologies for not being of use. It was a weak and depressed voice, lamenting his incompetence in breaking the curse.
He had no obligation to undo the curse in the first place, and didn’t need to apologize. But even so, he still apologized as if he was to blame.
And when the time came for their abrupt farewell, what he said was words of restraint for her sake. His actions done for her safety had no chance of being malicious.
“Suimei-kun…”
That’s why it’s fine now. Because of the way he was, Lefille didn’t want him to encounter any more danger. His figure shouldn’t be around her, the one who could only head down the path of destruction.
If he could just hide in the forest obediently, it would be over soon. She might defeat Rajas, or pass on vexingly in Rajas’ hands, it would be over soon.
That’s right, there was nothing that would please her more than him being safe.
— Even if she couldn’t see his cheerful smile ever again.
Even if his voice that tried to stopped her echoed in her ears.
Even if the last expression she saw on his face was a mixture of sadness and anxiety.
She knew that her choice was just hopeless wilfullness. All that talk about helping those who abandoned her, was a form of betrayal to the feelings of the one who came to help her alone despite without hesitation. A girl like her had no value in being saved.
But even so, even if things were like this—
“This is fine. This is…”
She found it hard to hold back the tears welling up, it was a warmth that welled up like a tide from the innermost depths of her heart. It was filled with sorrow and anguish, the pain of having no choice but to bear such a fate. If she could meet that young man in another way, she wouldn’t have such an ending? When he followed her, when he chatted with her while enduring with the awkwardness, when he tried to stop her from going. She felt so happy during each of these moments.
That’s why emotions she never felt before spilled forth when she reminiscence those times. It wasn’t the sadness of a cherished person passing on, or the sorrow of missing a home that was already gone. It was a pain that gripped at her heart, her reluctance to part with him.
But she didn’t want to run anymore. She didn’t want to see anyone else die. Being helpless while someone besides her was being tormented, she had enough of such things.
“...Ugh.”
That’s why, she wiped away the warm thoughts falling from the corner of her eyes away, and ran with all her might.