I’ve always had a crush on Ryan’s dad, Will; getting tongue-tied, stuttering, and unable to look him in the eyes for too long without blushing. He was strong, handsome, and always so kind. Even being patient waiting for me to murmur out my response to his questions without rushing me, he would just smile and continue on the conversation. I admired him, and without even realizing it, I began to copy his mannerisms; from the way he walked, to the way he styled his hair, and even how he dressed! I mean, I’m only 17, and I know his dad doesn’t look at me like that, but I still couldn’t stop my heart’s frantic beating every time I saw him.
“Hey Ian, you seen Ryan around?” his dad asked of me (I was walking around town, hovering the usual spots). “N-n-no. Er, I don’t think.. so” Ugh! Why am I so awkward? I’ve been friends with Ryan for years, and spoken with his dad multiple times during our friendship! So, why was this so hard…?
He smiled and my heart stopped, “You wanna ride a long?” I knew he meant while he searched for Ryan. I wanted to, but I knew I would probably just sit there awkwardly, rigid, and unable to have a conversation without being awkward…
“uh…” he waved his hand, “come on, I can give you a ride home after.” “Oh, uh, okay. Then, s-s-sure!” I smiled, he always knew how to make everyone feel included and not awkward.
“What’d you do today, sport?” Crap, I wanted to respond but I didn’t want to talk too long. “Oh uh… you know… just school and wander around.” I stopped, then realized I should probably ask him too. “and y-“ “yeah I just- oh sorry please continue I didn’t mean to interrupt.” He took a brief moment to take his eyes off the road and look over at me. Ah… my face is burning up , “Oh uh… I was just going to ask what you had done today.” I awkwardly laughed a bit afterwards.
“Ah, well I just…” I kind of zoned out as he talked about his day at the office, he was a lawyer and he was telling me about his multiple cases he was working on, but I was paying more attention to admire that strong, masculine, jaw. His hair… his smell.
“Ah, here he is.” My thoughts interrupted as he pulled up to the sidewalk. Ryan was hanging out with some of our other friends at the park. Ryan finished talking with them and jogged over to the car (I moved to the back seat so Ryan could have the front).
“Hey Dad, hey Ian.” We immediately started talking about the events at school, upcoming dances, who we were going to ask… assignments and stuff like that. I was a little sad my conversation with Will was already over.
I caught his eyes in the reflection of the mirror a few times during my conversation with Ryan. I blushed slightly and then I continued speaking with Ryan, thinking of mine and Will’s eye-tag.
We arrived at Ryan’s house and they invited me in for dinner, which after some slight resistance they convinced me to join… During dinner Will finally joined the conversation again, captivating my attention with his suave voice, and natural confidence… He had changed into some more casual clothes, so I was able to admire his arms while he wasn’t looking… Ryan said something and we all laughed and I just admired his beautiful smile…
Before I knew it dinner was over and Will was ready to drive me back to my house (Ryan had a lot of homework so he stayed back to do homework). We were driving, and I lived a ways out of town, so we sat in silence for a bit before I looked over and he caught me staring at him; he smiled and flexed his muscle, allowing me a show, I knew he was just teasing, because this was just like his flirtatious-humor. I felt a slight pressure in my pants and finally I just couldn’t hold it in anymore, after 10 years of knowing him, I decided I was going to express my feelings but as I took a breath to speak, he began talking.