love is an expression of productiveness and implies care, respect, responsibility and
knowledge. It is not an "affect" in the sense of being affected by somebody, but an
active striving for the growth and happiness of the loved person, rooted in one's own
capacity to love.
To love somebody is the actualization and concentration of the power to love. The
basic affirmation contained in love is directed toward the beloved person as an
incarnation of essentially human qualities. Love of one person implies love of man as
such. The kind of "division of labor," as William James calls it, by which one loves
one's family but is without feeling for the "stranger," is a sign of a basic inability to
love. Love of man is not, as is frequently supposed, an abstraction coming after the
love for a specific person, but it is its premise, although genetically it is acquired in
loving specific individuals.
From this it follows that my own self must be as much an object of my love as
another person. The affirmation of one's own life, happiness, growth, freedom is
rooted in one's capacity to love, i.e., in care, respect, responsibility, and knowledge. If
an individual is able to love productively, he loves himself too; if he can love only
others, he cannot love at all.