In most households with multiple children, sibling rivalry exists to some degree. Tension between brothers often includes some form of aggressive behavior and strife between sisters often results in hurt feelings and damaged emotions. Fighting between brothers and sisters usually includes a mix of both. As a parent, you can't always play referee, but you can establish some rules of conduct to help your children learn to fight fair.
Define the Problem
As a parent, you might feel like pulling your hair out every time your children get into an argument, but it isn't your job to solve the problem. Your role is to teach your kids how to respond and deal with frustrations, so that they can resolve conflicts on their own. According to the article "How to Handle Back Talk," on the Family Education website, one rule for fighting fair is to define the problem. Helping your children learn how to define the real problem can help them resolve issues before the issues escalate into full-blow fights. For example, you might coach your kids by saying, "Susie, why do you think your brother is frustrated with you right now? Did you do something that wasn't kind?" Or, you might say, "James, are you really upset because your brother called you Jimmy or because you don't want him messing up your room and playing with your video game?" Defining the problem makes it easier for your children to address the root cause behind their frustration, and to respond with fair and reasonable behavior.
Encourage Self-Control
Hitting, kicking, biting and yelling usually make fights between children more intense and more difficult to control. You'll likely need to lay down ground rules and punishments for that type of behavior, such as timeouts, sending your child to her room, removing contentious toys and making the offending child apologize. Unless you have twins or children of equal size, the weakest child will likely get the bad end of the deal once aggressive behavior is expressed. Encourage your children to exhibit self-control even when they're angry, and remind them that hitting, biting and kicking leave scratches and bruises that hurt. Disallow name calling, even if it's humorous or sarcastic. Teaching your children to exhibit self-control at home will also help when conflicts arise in the classroom or on the playground.
Model Respect
According to the website, She Knows Parenting, if your kids see you engaging in conflict constructively and respectfully, they will learn from that behavior. As you model respect by talking to your children politely, correcting behavior with a loving attitude and resolving conflicts with your spouse in a fair and amicable manner, your kids will follow by example. Avoid losing your temper and take a break by going into another room if you feel like a conflict might escalate. Tell your child, "I'm frustrated because your dad forgot to do something, so I'm going to read for a few minutes until I'm not angry any more." Or, "I'm disappointed that you talked rudely to your sister, so I'm going in the other room until you and your sister can talk politely to each other." As you model calm and respectful behavior, your children will learn acceptable rules for fair fighting.
Seek a Compromise
Conflicts between children don't always have clearly defined solutions, since neither is truly at fault. As a parent, you can encourage compromise so both children feel like their needs have been met and their frustrations have been validated. You might say, "I know you're upset because your sister is watching a cartoon, so ask her if you can use the TV to play video games once her show is over." Or, "In half an hour, why don't you switch toys so you can play with the blocks and your brother can play with the robots." By coaching your children to seek compromise, your acknowledge the frustrated child but ward off full-blown fights. Once your children see that compromise works, they will often find ways to compromise on their own.
In most households with multiple children, sibling rivalry exists to some degree. Tension between brothers often includes some form of aggressive behavior and strife between sisters often results in hurt feelings and damaged emotions. Fighting between brothers and sisters usually includes a mix of both. As a parent, you can't always play referee, but you can establish some rules of conduct to help your children learn to fight fair.Define the Problem As a parent, you might feel like pulling your hair out every time your children get into an argument, but it isn't your job to solve the problem. Your role is to teach your kids how to respond and deal with frustrations, so that they can resolve conflicts on their own. According to the article "How to Handle Back Talk," on the Family Education website, one rule for fighting fair is to define the problem. Helping your children learn how to define the real problem can help them resolve issues before the issues escalate into full-blow fights. For example, you might coach your kids by saying, "Susie, why do you think your brother is frustrated with you right now? Did you do something that wasn't kind?" Or, you might say, "James, are you really upset because your brother called you Jimmy or because you don't want him messing up your room and playing with your video game?" Defining the problem makes it easier for your children to address the root cause behind their frustration, and to respond with fair and reasonable behavior.ส่งเสริมให้ควบคุมตนเอง ตี เตะ การเสียดสีและมักจะตะโกนให้ต่อสู้ระหว่างเด็กที่รุนแรงมากขึ้น และยากต่อการควบคุม คุณอาจจะต้องวางกฎพื้นดินและลงโทษสำหรับชนิดของพฤติกรรม หมดเวลา เช่นส่งเด็กไปยังห้องของเธอ เอาของเล่นที่โต้เถียง และทำให้เด็กกระทำผิดกฎหมายต้องขออภัย ยกเว้นว่าคุณมีฝาแฝดหรือเด็กขนาดเท่า เด็กกำจัดจุดจะได้รับสิ้นสุดข้อตกลงดีมากเมื่อแสดงพฤติกรรมก้าวร้าว ส่งเสริมให้เด็กแสดงอารมณ์แม้จะโกรธ และเตือนพวกเขาว่าตี เสียดสี และเตะออกจากรอยขีดข่วนและขอดที่เจ็บ ไม่อนุญาตการเรียกชื่อ แม้ว่าจะเป็นอารมณ์ขัน หรือแดกดัน สอนให้เด็กแสดงอารมณ์ที่บ้านจะยังช่วยให้เมื่อความขัดแย้งที่เกิดขึ้น ในห้องเรียน หรือสนามเด็กเล่นรูปเคารพ According to the website, She Knows Parenting, if your kids see you engaging in conflict constructively and respectfully, they will learn from that behavior. As you model respect by talking to your children politely, correcting behavior with a loving attitude and resolving conflicts with your spouse in a fair and amicable manner, your kids will follow by example. Avoid losing your temper and take a break by going into another room if you feel like a conflict might escalate. Tell your child, "I'm frustrated because your dad forgot to do something, so I'm going to read for a few minutes until I'm not angry any more." Or, "I'm disappointed that you talked rudely to your sister, so I'm going in the other room until you and your sister can talk politely to each other." As you model calm and respectful behavior, your children will learn acceptable rules for fair fighting.Seek a Compromise Conflicts between children don't always have clearly defined solutions, since neither is truly at fault. As a parent, you can encourage compromise so both children feel like their needs have been met and their frustrations have been validated. You might say, "I know you're upset because your sister is watching a cartoon, so ask her if you can use the TV to play video games once her show is over." Or, "In half an hour, why don't you switch toys so you can play with the blocks and your brother can play with the robots." By coaching your children to seek compromise, your acknowledge the frustrated child but ward off full-blown fights. Once your children see that compromise works, they will often find ways to compromise on their own.
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