I got my first pair of glasses when I was seven. Even then, I was concerned that people would call me a “nerd”. I chose a pair of thick round translucent red plastic frames. I was not a hipster; I was seven. Still, I only wore them when I absolutely had to. Looking at a faraway blackboard. Playing youth sports. I must have looked like my little league’s Elton John.
In seventh grade, disaster struck. I lost my glasses (now a pair of sleeker wire frames) for an entire month. I had to sit in the front of every class. I squinted all day. I did, however, finally have an excuse for my poor little league performance. When I found the misplaced glasses between couch cushions, I decided to make a change. From then on, I would wear them all day every day. I was going to be that guy.
Since then, I’ve felt a special bond with other bespectacled folks. I make friends with them faster. I imagine we have common interests like… I don’t know… books, maybe? I also find myself developing crushes on girls with glasses at an alarming pace.
It can’t be a coincidence that at the same time I was making my transition to full time four-eyes, the movie She’s All That hit the theaters. We all remember She’s All That, right? Fairy god-bro Freddie Prinze Jr turns undeniable cutie Rachel Leigh Cook from a pretty, quirky artist to a pretty, bland prom queen. The transformation culminates, as they often do, when she takes off her glasses and lets her hair down. I couldn’t have been the only guy watching and thinking: “Keep them on!”
I’ve thought about this topic for a while and I’ve come up with the top five reasons I like girls with glasses:
1. They Seem Brainier
No, it doesn’t quite make sense why people with glasses seems smarter. It’s the same as how people with mustaches seem creepier and people with Tapout shirts seem douchier. But a lady with spectacles seems like she’s got things on her mind. Like you can talk to her without hearing about a Kardashian. Plenty of women without glasses are smart too, obviously, but you have to talk to them to figure it out and sometimes I’m shy!
2. They’re Less Image Conscious
Well, this might not be true. There are actually two options: a. They don’t stress out about their image. Or b. They like the “nerd” look. Either way… great!
3. Tina Fey
She kind of blew the lid off of this phenomenon, guys. She’s smart, she’s funny, she’s pretty. Jennifer Aniston’s haircut from friends got so popular that “The Rachel” style became a national trend. I’m seeing the same thing with medium length brown hair and cats eye frames. I call it “The Tina”. Mostly to myself.
4. It’s Visually Appealing
Right? I mean, I am a straight male person, so I don’t always notice accessories. I can’t tell if boots and purses match. I’m not big into jewelry. But glasses put a big, obvious accessory right in your face. It’s the visual equivalent of: “My eyes are up here!”
5. They Can Always Take Them Off
Okay, Freddie Prinze Jr, I give in. It’s kind of sexy when a girl takes off her glasses. It’s like her face is telling you a secret. Or something less awkward-sounding and more sexy-sounding. Variety is the spice of life, they say. And most women don’t carry around a pair of non-prescription lenses just to mix it up. But anyone with glasses on can always take them off, and it’s like a whole different face. Have I proven yet I don’t know how to say things are sexy? Just trust me. It’s great.
by Josh Gondelman
I got my first pair of glasses when I was seven. Even then, I was concerned that people would call me a “nerd”. I chose a pair of thick round translucent red plastic frames. I was not a hipster; I was seven. Still, I only wore them when I absolutely had to. Looking at a faraway blackboard. Playing youth sports. I must have looked like my little league’s Elton John.In seventh grade, disaster struck. I lost my glasses (now a pair of sleeker wire frames) for an entire month. I had to sit in the front of every class. I squinted all day. I did, however, finally have an excuse for my poor little league performance. When I found the misplaced glasses between couch cushions, I decided to make a change. From then on, I would wear them all day every day. I was going to be that guy.Since then, I’ve felt a special bond with other bespectacled folks. I make friends with them faster. I imagine we have common interests like… I don’t know… books, maybe? I also find myself developing crushes on girls with glasses at an alarming pace.It can’t be a coincidence that at the same time I was making my transition to full time four-eyes, the movie She’s All That hit the theaters. We all remember She’s All That, right? Fairy god-bro Freddie Prinze Jr turns undeniable cutie Rachel Leigh Cook from a pretty, quirky artist to a pretty, bland prom queen. The transformation culminates, as they often do, when she takes off her glasses and lets her hair down. I couldn’t have been the only guy watching and thinking: “Keep them on!”I’ve thought about this topic for a while and I’ve come up with the top five reasons I like girls with glasses:1. They Seem BrainierNo, it doesn’t quite make sense why people with glasses seems smarter. It’s the same as how people with mustaches seem creepier and people with Tapout shirts seem douchier. But a lady with spectacles seems like she’s got things on her mind. Like you can talk to her without hearing about a Kardashian. Plenty of women without glasses are smart too, obviously, but you have to talk to them to figure it out and sometimes I’m shy!2. They’re Less Image ConsciousWell, this might not be true. There are actually two options: a. They don’t stress out about their image. Or b. They like the “nerd” look. Either way… great!3. Tina FeyShe kind of blew the lid off of this phenomenon, guys. She’s smart, she’s funny, she’s pretty. Jennifer Aniston’s haircut from friends got so popular that “The Rachel” style became a national trend. I’m seeing the same thing with medium length brown hair and cats eye frames. I call it “The Tina”. Mostly to myself.4. It’s Visually AppealingRight? I mean, I am a straight male person, so I don’t always notice accessories. I can’t tell if boots and purses match. I’m not big into jewelry. But glasses put a big, obvious accessory right in your face. It’s the visual equivalent of: “My eyes are up here!”5. They Can Always Take Them OffOkay, Freddie Prinze Jr, I give in. It’s kind of sexy when a girl takes off her glasses. It’s like her face is telling you a secret. Or something less awkward-sounding and more sexy-sounding. Variety is the spice of life, they say. And most women don’t carry around a pair of non-prescription lenses just to mix it up. But anyone with glasses on can always take them off, and it’s like a whole different face. Have I proven yet I don’t know how to say things are sexy? Just trust me. It’s great.by Josh Gondelman
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