As great as it would be to have a bumper car arena at the University of Virginia, I didn't manage to make that happen this semester. So, I'm going to have to make compromises. But don't feel too sorry for me. To start with, I have these great little miniature hovercrafts. I actually have four of them, and they can zoom about the table and bump into one another. Boing. Boing. Collisions galore. They're perfectly good bumper cars. If you happen to be a gerbil.