Shizuku easily told him the truth he didn’t want to hear, which made Kouki make a reproachful gaze. However, Shizuku only thought of it as a passing wind. Angered by her attitude, just like a child throwing a tantrum, Kouki began to spit out what was in his mind.
“… Why, why is it Nagumo. When we were still in Japan, he was an otaku, unmotivated, and he nothing special in terms of sports or studies either… always forcing his laugh, and being out of place… He took a noncommittal attitude whenever Kaori talked to him… he was an otaku… if it was me, I wouldn’t treat Kaori coldly. I’d always think of her as important, and I would do my best for Kaori’s sake… Besides, Nagumo was waited upon by those girls in such a manner, isn’t he the lowest to treat them like that? Not only that, he is a murderer! He killed a non-resisting woman. So, do you think I was wrong!? That’s right, it is strange for Kaori to like such a bastard after all. He surely must have “SWISh!” Guhah!?”
Heating up as he spoke, Kouki began to badmouth Hajime with fabricated truths which once again awarded him a forehead flick (No Beat ver.) from Shizuku. What are you doing!?, was conveyed by Kouki’s glare which was ignored by Shizuku who was wearing an amazed expression.
“Again, your bad habit is coming out, you know? I’ve kept saying until now that you should stop interpreting things at your own convenience.
“Interpreting things to my convenience… there’s no way—”
“Haven’t you noticed it yet? Kouki, you don’t know anything about Nagumo-kun, right? You don’t know anything about the time we were still in Japan or in this world… and those girls looked happy, no, they really were happy, you see? But you ignored that fact and said something selfish… The current Kouki is only trying to make Hajime out to be a bad person who is unsuitable for Kaori. If that isn’t called as interpreting things at your own convenience, then what is?”
“B-But… it is the true he killed a person.”
“… At that time, even I was about to kill her. However, I couldn’t muster my strength. Even in the future… if a similar thing happens, then I will surely swing my sword to kill, for the sake of surviving, for the sake of the people important to me. Though I don’t know whether I can do it, since I will only know when the time comes… For now, the thing I did was only attempted murder… but, are you going to despise me if I become a murderer?”
Shizuku’s confession made Kouki speechless. His childhood friend, Shizuku, held a stronger sense of responsibility and justice than others, so he suddenly felt like she was a distant existence after hearing she was truly going to kill. However, Kouki shook his head when he noticed the shadow of anxiety and the fear of injuring a person in Shizuku’s bitter smile.
Seeing Kouki’s reaction, Shizuku continued her words which could be called a soliloquy.
“Certainly, his transformation is surprising… and thinking about his character when we were still in Japan, it’s not an exaggeration to say he’s a different person… Well, even so, it looks like Kaori still thought of him as “Nagumo Hajime,” and it looks like not all of him has changed… but one thing you must not forget, he fought that woman to save us and killed her in our stead.”
“… Are you saying it is right to kill.”
“I… I don’t think it is right. A murder is a murder after all… I can neither justify it nor do I want to.”
“Then…”
“Even so, we aren’t qualified to criticize Nagumo-kun. It was no one’s fault, but our own weakness…”
In short, he should solve it himself if he has a problem with it. It was simply that he was not strong enough, so he couldn’t reach the result he hoped for. It was a mistake to complain about the result to the person he left everything with.
Noticing the unexpressed words, Kouki recalled that he could only crawl at the time Hajime displayed his peerlessness. Unable to object, he fell into sullen silence. His dissatisfied expression was obviously saying, “But, it is the truth that he killed a person!”
Towards Kouki’s obstinacy, with an admonishing tone, Shizuku tacitly warned him about what had happened thus far, along with what she felt after coming to this world.
“I don’t hate Kouki’s straightforward sense of justice.”
“… Shizuku.”
“However. I think it’s about time for you to start doubting whether you are actually in the right.”
“Doubting my justice?”
“Certainly, a strong feeling is necessary to get things done. But, a distortion will surely appear if you don’t doubt it and just keep moving on, blindly believing on it. That’s why when that happens, I want you to react to it by wondering if you are really in the right, or whether you still need to do it “even” if you know it is wrong… it isn’t bad if you continue to think like that, okay? … truthfully, it is difficult to keep on living rightfully. Having come to this world, I cut lives even though they were demonic beasts… I’ve come to think so.”
Totally ignorant that Shizuku was thinking thus every time she killed a demonic beast, Kouki became pop-eyed.
“Kouki. You are not always the correct one and even if you are in the right. You should know that your rightfulness can become a lethal weapon. Well, the way you interpreted things at your convenience this time was not coming from your conviction of “justice,” it was coming from your jealousy.”
“N-no, for me to feel jealous…”
“It is uncool to make an excuse to deceive me here, you know?”
“…”
Kouki once again cast his gaze down, looking at the moon on the water surface. However, the dark mood from a while ago had weakened, and he seemed to be thinking deeply about something. Anyway, he had avoided rushing into a spiral of negativity, and Shizuku leaked out a relieved sigh, knowing that.
Thus, thinking it was necessary to leave him alone for now, Shizuku stopped leaning on the railing and tried to quietly leave the place. Then, Kouki’s mutter came from behind Shizuku, who had already turned on her heels.
“Shizuku… you won’t go anywhere, right?”
“… What’s with this all of a sudden?”
“… Please don’t go, Shizuku.”
“…”
Kouki’s words were as if he was petitioning her. It was a line that would made the female students in Japan and the girls of the Kingdom that fell for him go kya kya, but unfortunately, Shizuku only displayed an “amazed” expression. He might be weakened by the feeling of loss because Kaori had gone… Shizuku looked over her shoulder, towards the blurring moon. It was the moon that was on water surface which Kouki had been looking at previously.
“At the very least I am not like the “moon”… I won’t just leave a man that is depending on me.”
Saying thus, Shizuku left the place. Left behind, Kouki watched the alley where Shizuku disappeared for a while, then once again, he looked at the moon reflected on the water surface. Next, he noticed the meaning behind her words.
“… I see… the moon reflected on the water’s surface.”
Flowers reflected on a mirror and the moon reflected on the water’s surface. Those were words speaking about a thing that could be seen but not be reached, visible but with no substance, just like a reflection. He unconsciously looked at the reflected moon as Kaori, and certainly it was not something he could reach. Especially after seeing Kaori’s expression at the time she confessed her feelings to Hajime.
Shizuki said she was not “the moon reflected on the water’s surface”. So, it’s possible for him to reach her. However, her next words were severe. Kouki inadvertently made a wry smile. He thought about what he had just said to his childhood friend.
Kouki stopped looking at the reflected moon, he looked up at the sky. He had unconditionally believed that he could reach “it” if he just stretched out his hand, but he realized “it” was awfully quite far. Letting out a deep sigh, Kouki began to think about the words coming from his strict and gentle childhood friend.
To change or not to change… it was up to Kouki.