ืืn the West, the term 'tender, loving care' (TLC) has traditionally been used as a defining term that characterizes nursing. W Quality one-on-one time gives the message to the receiver of the BRG how special they are to the giver. The BRG also creates a relaxed mood for the giver and the receiver to share verbal communication of caring with each other. Young children feel loved to the extent that someone takes care of them. Giving them the BRG transmits the message “you’re important, you matter, you are loved” and also results in building self esteem.
2. Deep breathing is modeled during the BRG for both the receiver and giver to experience deep relaxation and stress reduction which enhances physical and emotional healing for the body, mind and spirit.
3. Verbal words of praise are spoken to the receiver during the BRG to communicate and express feelings of compassion. Hearing loving phases from a family member giving the game: “I love you, you are great" or from newfound friends learning to give the game, "I really like giving you the game”, increases self-esteem and self-worth.
4. Creating safe boundaries with direct communication allows the recipient of the BRG to say specifically and clarify what one does not want and what one does want. The giver learns to ask and propose options how to administer the BRG to the receiver and immediately responds accordingly. The result is the creation of safe boundaries so the receivers of the BRG can relax and trust that their request will be respected and responded to every time they receive the BRG.
5. Experience immediate positive reinforcement: As the recipient of the BRG one gets to receive one's heart's desire even if one is only pretending in the role-playing during the game. Therapeutic massage strokes are performed on the back in a storyline fashion imagining one's back is a garden. The recipient gets to choose what kind of magic seeds get planted and then harvested as part of the BRG. In short the recipient gets to feel what it is like to have their fantasies come true immediately. The experience also fosters learning how to ask for what one wants.
6. Laughter and joy: The BRG creates a lot of spontaneous laughter and joy for both the giver and receiver. Physical Health Benefits of laughter include boosting immunity, lowering stress hormones, decreasing pain and relaxing your muscles. Mental Health Benefits of laughter include adding joy and zest to life, easing anxiety and fear, relieving stress, inspiring hope and improving mood. Social Benefits of laughter include strengthening relationships, attracting others, and promotes group bonding and stronger connections. The BRG is just lots of fun and a thrill to share.
7. Using guided imagery: Research proves that using guided imagery helps elevate mood and decreases stress. It was also found to significantly decrease depression, fatigue and lower cortisol, a stress hormone. During the BRG both the giver and the receiver learn and practice fun guided imagery. Everyone experiences immediate and positive effects of using the guided imagery which inspires them to repeat the techniques in the future on their own to counter loneliness or feelings of isolation. During the application of the guided imagery one can imagine (once again) receiving love, energy, and/or healing from their loved ones and/or friend.
8. TLC Comfort Holds© are practiced as part of learning the BRG. The receivers of the BRG (whenever appropriate) do the Comfort Holds on the front of their bodies at the same time they are given the Comfort Holds on their back. The TLC Comfort Holds© are taught as a sequence or can be done individually for future self-healing. These gentle holds can be used as a substitute for the BRG if someone is fragile, limited to being on their back or asleep. These Holds can be used in combination with guided imagery by those who receive and/or give the Holds. Even doing just one hold for a few minutes has powerful long-lasting benefits.
9. Available FOR FREE anytime any place. One can initiate asking any family member or friend to give the BRG. If they do not know the BRG, one can give it to them first or have them read the BRG booklet and then ask them to give/exchange it back. The BRG can be given and/or exchanged for free with clothes on with no props at: any location or occasion, any time of the day or night, even when asleep, while in a waiting room, as a passenger in a car, while listening to music or watching TV and before or after receiving chemotherapy or radiation. The BRG can be improvised to be given to oneself on the skin of the hand, arm, and legs or even done as a scalp or face massage. The TLC Comfort Holds can also be self administered anytime, anyplace and have an additional impact when guided imagery is simultaneously included.
10. Giving back the BRG is an option to do either immediately or later. The receiver is given the opportunity to express their caring back to the giver and this act in and of itself is over-the-top "bonus" healing. Giving back the BRG is fun and empowers the participant to feel useful as they "magically" become the healer. They get to give THE GIFT back. Even if challenged they have a powerful way to return the love/caring via the BRG and/or the TLC Comfort Holds. And what a double win. The giver of the BRG becomes the receiver and their batteries are charged to keep on giving in the future. The flow of Giving and Receiving circulates between the original pair and then beyond to others they share the BRG with.
11. Everyone can be a teacher of the BRG: Our intention is for everyone to become a member of the BRG Club and “Pay It Forward” like in the book and movie. Our non-profit foundation will support BRG Club members to share the BRG with three people and ask those three to in turn share it will three others, on and on. In this way each person, young or old, has the opportunity to create their own individual legacy of helping make the world a better place. In a relatively short time families both ill and healthy all over the world will be receiving the benefits of increased family bonding and all the benefits of these twelve practices.
We are developing BRG Chapters on campuses with volunteer college/universities and local Community Leaders. These leaders will teach workshops to volunteers from their campus and community to become Certified BRG Teachers. The BRG Teachers will go out into their community and teach the BRG for free for families and children with life-limiting/chronic illness, in hospice and Special Needs. In this way we all become closer and connected as ONE BIG FAMILY all united, sharing a common practice via the BRG.
12. Lasting memories of bonding from sharing the BRG will be like the gift that keeps on giving. Research reports of a case study done ten years after parents gave their seriously ill child massage. Both the giver and receiver of massage remembered the experience as being both physically and emotionally healing. Even though it was a decade later they both still cherished the massage experience as creating a memory of love shared that would last for the rest of their lives.
hen this expression informs practice, it can comfort the human spirit at times of fear and vulnerability. Such notions offer meaning and resonance to the 'lived experience' of giving and receiving care. This suggests that, in a nursing context, TLC is rooted firmly in relationship, that is, the dynamic that exists between carer and cared for. Despite this emphasis on relationship, there is a scarcity of literature that draws a connection between TLC and the moral challenge that is so much a part of human interaction. In this article we will address this deficit and present a narrative that places TLC at the centre of moral engagement between nurse and patient; in essence, we offer an alternative means of viewing relational ethics