Why do I cry a lot because of this.

Why do I cry a lot because of this. We never met and you mean to me, why do you hate me so much. I'm dying my heart went crazy, why do I care about you. Why do I have to love those who hate me, I'm very lonely, but now I can not talk to other men either, I tried to talk to other guys, I never do anything stupid like this before, or my heart it was. to death. Because I still love you. But today, I'm breaking my dreams. I want to have children. I tried to kill a migraine. My migraine pain less. I try so that I can have children, and my child had to remove the threat. But the most important thing is the father of my child. I want you to be the father of my child. I know it's not good, I said to myself with you. I am a bad woman, Thai woman but I don't care and I know it will make you hate me so much, But somehow you could never love me. No possible way.. But it did not stop me. And I know there is no possible way. Today I know. Do you hate me so much as I love you more every day. How much you mean to me. I want to hate you