I'm not impressed with getting olde

I'm not impressed with getting older,
It doesn't seem like a lot of fun,
Every joint seems to be seizing up,
And my feet won't let me run,

I don't hear as well as I used to,
My sight has never been good,
I'm still too slim, not curvy,
In spite of eating lots of pud!

I know now that I'll never be rounded,
Although for many years I've tried,
To grow a bosom I could catch crumbs on.
But my wish has been denied.

I suppose that I'm still quite bendy,
In spite of advancing years,
I'm able to push my head on my knees,
Without a hint of tears!

One of my greatest pleasures,
Is a long, lovely, lazy soak in the tub, (Alliteration)
Up to my chin in bubbles,
and a bestseller from the book club.

I've always been impatient,
Some things never alter,
But now I want things yesterday,
Ask him indoors John Walter!

I guess I shouldn't grumble,
Things could be so much worse,
I could explode with impatience,